Today I had an “aha” moment. My co-worker Steve updated me on the status of his daughter and their dealings with her epileptic seizures. A couple years ago he began to carry this painful cross. As he continues to tell me how Jorden will have about two seizures per week the pain in his heart was evident. His faith keeps him and his family strong thru these scary moments but none the less, scary…..
In 2009 my daughter, Elizabeth was born at just 26 weeks gestation and that’s when my scary journey began. She was what they call in the medical field a Micro-Preemie, weighing only 1lb 8oz. Month after month I watched her fight for her life as she struggled to breathe due to her underdeveloped lungs. Connected to many lines that monitored her vitals and provided nutrition, she grimaced from the discomfort she apparently felt. I visited the NICU every day and patiently waited for the green light for her to come home. The baby room was ready but little did I know that it would soon turn into a mini-hospital room filled with oxygen tanks, a feeding pump, a suction machine and many other medical supplies.
I struggled with ownership, although I knew she was my daughter, most of the time it felt like she belonged to the doctors, nurses and hospital. They told me when to hold her, change her diaper and anything else in connection with her cares. This was not the mothering role I pictured myself to be in.
Today as I remembered how difficult those 17 months in the hospital were; I also remembered that my daughter belongs to the Lord. I am in a sense a Step-Mom. Her precious life has been entrusted to me, to help her develop into the person our Father wants her to be, to raise her in the ways of the Lord and to show her how to walk humbly before our God. Let us not take this responsibility lightly, but see our children as a calling placed on our lives.